Thanks for clearing that up for me Antonin!

Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia says “smacking someone in the face” is not cruel or unusual! Three cheers for torture!

Last week, in light of the recent publicity the CIA has received for waterboarding three terrorist suspects, Justice Scalia told the BBC that the Eighth Amendment is actually referring to punishment for a crime. Since many terrorists have not been charged or convicted of any crimes, the amendment clearly doesn’t apply to them. Furthermore, despite the wording of “cruel and unusual punishments [shall not be] inflicted” being very black-and-white sounding, it apparently is not. Again, Justice Scalia provided some insight by posing the questions, “How close does the threat have to be? And how severe can the infliction of pain be?”

I am so glad Justice Scalia offered this gray-area-view of the Constitution for me. I have been thinking a lot lately about “torture” and if it is morally permissible or not. Since we are at a significant risk of terrorist attacks (Code Yellow!), I am constantly worried that my home or car will be broken into by terrorists or other thugs. As such, I have tried to prepare myself by mentally running through hundreds of scenarios. And thanks to the guidance of a Supreme Court Justice, I now know the right thing to do if the situation presents itself.

For example, let’s pretend a burglar is trying to break into my home. After tackling him, wrestling him to the ground, and tying him up, I can safely assume he has other burglar friends who may at some point want to break into my house. At this point, I could call on the wisdom and guidance of Justice Scalia and take him into a dark room, put a bag over his head, and put his head into my sink while I force water all over his covered face. Or I can smack him, since that was specifically stated as being ok.

Either way, it is a morally righteous act. I am not doing it to punish him for breaking in, but merely to thwart the future attempts of other thieves.

God bless Supreme Court Justice’s Constitutional interpretations, and God bless the USA!

Note: This article/blog will also be appearing in the 2/25 edition of the UNLV Rebel Yell.